OK, I don't know what's come over me recently. But whatever it is has not been a good thing. I know I've been acting like a whiny dick, and I know people have noticed. Well, fuck that, I'm done.
I'm a firm believer in taking responsibility for your own actions, and this is no exception. Whatever triggered this (everyone getting ready to go home, worries about the status of my research as my first-year report looms on the horizon, whatever), is no fucking excuse. I've been whiny and self-involved and nobody likes that guy.
So, from here on out, no more. I was doing well most of this year, and have slipped lately. I'm going back. For those of you who have noticed this, I apologise; please rest assured it was nothing to do with you. It was me, and it was stupid to let it affect those around me. It won't happen again. Things are good, and from here on out, I'm gonna be nothing but sunshine and kittens (with the odd bout of overt hostility just to keep people on their toes, but point being no more whininess!)
Tuesday, May 23, 2006
Saturday, May 20, 2006
This time of year
I can never decide whether I hate this time of year, or love it. On the plus side, it's great to see the weather get nice again (or in the case of Manchester, less-ugly). I love seeing everything burst into bloom, the return of green, and of course, it's always nice when girls abandon their bulky sweaters for T-shirts, sun-dresses and tank tops. This was even more pronounced back in Canada-when you've had five months of huge parkas, seeing a tank top again is like a gift from God.
The downside is that everybody leaves. This, of course, will change once out of university, but in the meantime, late spring is the point where I go from having a pile of people I can call at any moment for the purpose of evening sojourns, to having just a few. This always bums me out, and I hate that aspect of this time of year.
What bugs me even more is that it seems, to me, totally unnecessary. People scamper home so soon after the end of the school year, in order to spend the summer with their families and work summer jobs-invariably crappy, minimum-wage jobs. Now, I have nothing wrong with wanting to see your family, I totally get that. But why this perverse rush to sacrifice independence and work at a crappy job? I mean, you spend all year wanting to be able to spend time with your friends without the threat of classes and exams hanging over you, and when that opportunity presents itself, you run off? I have no doubt that there are crappy, low-aying jobs here you could get just as easily, and generally, most people are on year-long leases, so their houses/apartments are paid for over the summer anyway. Yes, you get free food and laundry at home, but at what cost? The loss of freedom to which you've grown accustomed? Is that really worth it?
I just wish more people stuck around, even if only for a few weeks. Summer shouldn't be so lonely.
The downside is that everybody leaves. This, of course, will change once out of university, but in the meantime, late spring is the point where I go from having a pile of people I can call at any moment for the purpose of evening sojourns, to having just a few. This always bums me out, and I hate that aspect of this time of year.
What bugs me even more is that it seems, to me, totally unnecessary. People scamper home so soon after the end of the school year, in order to spend the summer with their families and work summer jobs-invariably crappy, minimum-wage jobs. Now, I have nothing wrong with wanting to see your family, I totally get that. But why this perverse rush to sacrifice independence and work at a crappy job? I mean, you spend all year wanting to be able to spend time with your friends without the threat of classes and exams hanging over you, and when that opportunity presents itself, you run off? I have no doubt that there are crappy, low-aying jobs here you could get just as easily, and generally, most people are on year-long leases, so their houses/apartments are paid for over the summer anyway. Yes, you get free food and laundry at home, but at what cost? The loss of freedom to which you've grown accustomed? Is that really worth it?
I just wish more people stuck around, even if only for a few weeks. Summer shouldn't be so lonely.
Thursday, May 18, 2006
Bringing everyone up-to-date
Doing this (blogging) is something that I've intended to do for awhile. In a way, it seems like the perfect method of keeping people up to date on what I'm doing. It doesn't require a ton of mass-mails, people can check when they want, I get to fiddle around with a piece of the tech world that I've somehow missed despite it becoming really huge, everybody wins. But, I'm a procrastinator at heart, so it got delayed, time and again. I'm going to try and keep updates somewhat frequent, however, so hopefully I'll actually follow through with my plans for a change. But don't hold your breath.
As for what to expect, I can only promise this much: I will be honest with my posts, but perhaps not share the whole truth. There will be some things I won't be ready to share with anyone who wanders by, and there may be things that involve other people in my life that I will be unwilling to divulge right away. But nothing I post will be a lie, and I will strive to be open about as much as I can.
So, let's get everyone up to speed, shall we? For those keeping track at home, I moved from Southern Ontario, Canada to Manchester, England in September 2006. I'm currently doing a Ph. D. in Electrical and Electronic Engineering at the University of Manchester and am living in student halls. The program is a 3-4 year course, so ideally I should be done in late summer or early fall, 2008. Realistically, it may be early to mid 2009. After that, we'll see-my long-term plans are as yet, undetermined.
So, how's it been going? Well, there have been ups and downs, as I suppose is to be expected. Since coming here, I've met a number of very cool people, both through my program, my residence and largely through my extracurricular activities (i.e. debating). I've settled in pretty well, and am learning more and more about the city of Manchester, am generally able to find my way around town, and feel pretty comfortable with my surroundings.
Debating has gone well for me, and for the first time, I have had some quantifiable success. I debated in undergrad, but never made it to so much as the quarter-finals. Since being here, however, I have been on one winning team (where my partner and I were undefeated through four rounds plus the final), and have broken to quarters at the European championships in Berlin (my partner and I came 14th out of 168 teams, something we're pretty proud of, given the calibre of the competitors).
I've also done some travelling, both through debating, and independently. I've been as far afield as Portugal, Germany and Ireland, and as close as Livepool (don't worry, I didn't do myself the disservice of staying there, it was just fly out). I've seen Stonehenge and the Roman Baths in Bath, have stood atop the Reichstag in Berlin, and questioned the purpose of the Dublin spire (a giant metal spike in downtown Dublin. Weird).
Overall, I've loved living here. England is different from Canada, but not so different as to be totally baffling. Culturally there are enough similarities to keep things comfortable, with enough differences to keep things interesting. I've found the people to be amiable and affable, and (at least the ones with whom I've associated) have been intelligent and well-spoken, if a little right-leaning for my tastes (being a Canadian liberal and all that).
The downsides: the weather and my motivation. The weather here has actually been better than I'd expected, but only because this was apparently a fairly sunny year, as far as Manchester is concerned. Still, it rains often, is chilly often, yet lacks the metereological money shot that is a true winter or a true summer. Bland is a not-inaccurate description. Still, this is hardly the worst punishment in the world.
My motivation has been a much bigger issue. I've been "working" on my Ph. D. for eight months now, and if I were to attempt to quantify what I've done, I don't know if I could come up with anything substantial. Some of this is the fault of the university (especially early on, I had trouble getting any direction or access to equipment), but the overwhelming majority of the problem is mine. I just can't stay focused. I have background material to read, and I can't keep myself on-task. I have experiments I could be running, but can't focus long enough to do them, or analyse the data if I do. The topic I have interests me greatly, yet I am often consumed by a sense of ennui. I don't know why, and I wish I did. I keep telling myself that once I hit my stride, I'll be fine, and I do feel that to be true-I just wonder how long that will take.
My current concern is that the school year for the undergrads is winding down. Though I am a postgrad, most of my friends are undergrads-notably those from debating. As such, it is rapidly approaching one of my most loathed times of the year-the time when everyone scatters to the winds and I'm left largely alone. I can see it beginning already-people making plans to leave early and go home, many planning summer vacations, and those who are graduating planning their careers, inevitably away from Manchester. It's a fact of life, and to be expected, nonetheless something I wish I could avoid. Still, three of my closest friends will be here for the summer-NotARealScouser, NuclearD and RoseeGirl, so I'm sure I'll find ways to amuse myself.
The exciting thing for me at the moment, is that my parents (and possibly brother) are coming to visit in less than a week. They'll be in the UK from the 24th until June 6th, and I'm hoping that I can spend some good quality time with them, and possibly join them when they go to Edinburgh (in addition to Manchester, they're spending time in York, Edinburgh and Chester). This will, of course, cut into my web-browing.... er, Ph. D. researching.... time, but it'll be great to see them again-I haven't since Christmas.
So, that pretty much brings everyone up to date. As I say, I will try and add to this from time to time, so everyone can revel in the excitement, and/or stalk me, as they see fit. For now, all the best.
-Prometheus
As for what to expect, I can only promise this much: I will be honest with my posts, but perhaps not share the whole truth. There will be some things I won't be ready to share with anyone who wanders by, and there may be things that involve other people in my life that I will be unwilling to divulge right away. But nothing I post will be a lie, and I will strive to be open about as much as I can.
So, let's get everyone up to speed, shall we? For those keeping track at home, I moved from Southern Ontario, Canada to Manchester, England in September 2006. I'm currently doing a Ph. D. in Electrical and Electronic Engineering at the University of Manchester and am living in student halls. The program is a 3-4 year course, so ideally I should be done in late summer or early fall, 2008. Realistically, it may be early to mid 2009. After that, we'll see-my long-term plans are as yet, undetermined.
So, how's it been going? Well, there have been ups and downs, as I suppose is to be expected. Since coming here, I've met a number of very cool people, both through my program, my residence and largely through my extracurricular activities (i.e. debating). I've settled in pretty well, and am learning more and more about the city of Manchester, am generally able to find my way around town, and feel pretty comfortable with my surroundings.
Debating has gone well for me, and for the first time, I have had some quantifiable success. I debated in undergrad, but never made it to so much as the quarter-finals. Since being here, however, I have been on one winning team (where my partner and I were undefeated through four rounds plus the final), and have broken to quarters at the European championships in Berlin (my partner and I came 14th out of 168 teams, something we're pretty proud of, given the calibre of the competitors).
I've also done some travelling, both through debating, and independently. I've been as far afield as Portugal, Germany and Ireland, and as close as Livepool (don't worry, I didn't do myself the disservice of staying there, it was just fly out). I've seen Stonehenge and the Roman Baths in Bath, have stood atop the Reichstag in Berlin, and questioned the purpose of the Dublin spire (a giant metal spike in downtown Dublin. Weird).
Overall, I've loved living here. England is different from Canada, but not so different as to be totally baffling. Culturally there are enough similarities to keep things comfortable, with enough differences to keep things interesting. I've found the people to be amiable and affable, and (at least the ones with whom I've associated) have been intelligent and well-spoken, if a little right-leaning for my tastes (being a Canadian liberal and all that).
The downsides: the weather and my motivation. The weather here has actually been better than I'd expected, but only because this was apparently a fairly sunny year, as far as Manchester is concerned. Still, it rains often, is chilly often, yet lacks the metereological money shot that is a true winter or a true summer. Bland is a not-inaccurate description. Still, this is hardly the worst punishment in the world.
My motivation has been a much bigger issue. I've been "working" on my Ph. D. for eight months now, and if I were to attempt to quantify what I've done, I don't know if I could come up with anything substantial. Some of this is the fault of the university (especially early on, I had trouble getting any direction or access to equipment), but the overwhelming majority of the problem is mine. I just can't stay focused. I have background material to read, and I can't keep myself on-task. I have experiments I could be running, but can't focus long enough to do them, or analyse the data if I do. The topic I have interests me greatly, yet I am often consumed by a sense of ennui. I don't know why, and I wish I did. I keep telling myself that once I hit my stride, I'll be fine, and I do feel that to be true-I just wonder how long that will take.
My current concern is that the school year for the undergrads is winding down. Though I am a postgrad, most of my friends are undergrads-notably those from debating. As such, it is rapidly approaching one of my most loathed times of the year-the time when everyone scatters to the winds and I'm left largely alone. I can see it beginning already-people making plans to leave early and go home, many planning summer vacations, and those who are graduating planning their careers, inevitably away from Manchester. It's a fact of life, and to be expected, nonetheless something I wish I could avoid. Still, three of my closest friends will be here for the summer-NotARealScouser, NuclearD and RoseeGirl, so I'm sure I'll find ways to amuse myself.
The exciting thing for me at the moment, is that my parents (and possibly brother) are coming to visit in less than a week. They'll be in the UK from the 24th until June 6th, and I'm hoping that I can spend some good quality time with them, and possibly join them when they go to Edinburgh (in addition to Manchester, they're spending time in York, Edinburgh and Chester). This will, of course, cut into my web-browing.... er, Ph. D. researching.... time, but it'll be great to see them again-I haven't since Christmas.
So, that pretty much brings everyone up to date. As I say, I will try and add to this from time to time, so everyone can revel in the excitement, and/or stalk me, as they see fit. For now, all the best.
-Prometheus
Friday, May 12, 2006
Introduction to this blog
A little introduction:
If you do not know me, this blog will bore you completely. This is not an insightful blog, giving detailed analysis on politics, world events or culture, though I may yet delve into some of those subjects in my own time.
Rather, this is a blog for my friends and family. It's simply a way for them to keep up to date with what I'm doing and where I'm going. I will post my thoughts here, I will post descriptions of my travels, my trials and tribulations and anything else that seems relevant to me at the time.
As time goes on, I will no doubt mention a wide range of people in my writings. To enact some limited form of anonymity, I will use pseudonyms. As I do so, I will include a list of descriptions, a cast of characters if you will, so that anyone who views this site part-way through may have a little background.
By all means, read this as you will; but if you do not personally know me, do not expect anything too exciting. It's just one more page amongst millions, a personal site for those to whom I hopefully matter.
If you do not know me, this blog will bore you completely. This is not an insightful blog, giving detailed analysis on politics, world events or culture, though I may yet delve into some of those subjects in my own time.
Rather, this is a blog for my friends and family. It's simply a way for them to keep up to date with what I'm doing and where I'm going. I will post my thoughts here, I will post descriptions of my travels, my trials and tribulations and anything else that seems relevant to me at the time.
As time goes on, I will no doubt mention a wide range of people in my writings. To enact some limited form of anonymity, I will use pseudonyms. As I do so, I will include a list of descriptions, a cast of characters if you will, so that anyone who views this site part-way through may have a little background.
By all means, read this as you will; but if you do not personally know me, do not expect anything too exciting. It's just one more page amongst millions, a personal site for those to whom I hopefully matter.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
